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Episode 022: Let’s keep talkin’ about sex, baby!

In this episode, we get very real and raw as we keep talking about sex with some tips to thriving sexually in marriage.

Before listening to this episode, if you haven’t yet, you may want to go back and listen to Episode’s 018 – 021. In those episodes, we talk about “Marriage on Mission” and then dive deep into the discussion on intimacy.

At the very least, you’ll want to go back and listen to Episode 021, where we talk about roadblocks to sexual intimacy.

Just know, we are not experts. We are walking this road with you and we ourselves are working through many of the roadblocks to sexual intimacy that we talked about in the last episode.

Also, let us be clear, when we talk about pursuing sex with your spouse and being willing to have sex, we are in no way saying that you should just suck it up and have sex if you are in an abusive, sinful, unhealthy, manipulative, or controlling situation.

We are speaking primarily to couples or people who desire to be married someday, who are not on the verge of divorce, they don’t have any abuse, major sin, or unfaithfulness in the way, but they are struggling or unwilling to pursue healthy sexual intimacy with their spouse, or they want to take steps to improve their intimacy. That’s who we’re talking to.

Tips to thriving sexually:

1. Be Purposeful

Genesis 2:24 24 This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.

1 Corinthians 6:15-16 Don’t you realize that your bodies are actually parts of Christ? Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are united into one.”

2. Make it a Priority

Until healthy sexual intimacy becomes a priority in your marriage it will never become a common practice in your marriage.

Plan it! I’d rather plan sex in order to make it a priority, instead of relying on spontaneity and never having it.

When I asked Sabrina what she thought was the key to having a healthy and thriving sex life, she said this: “Saying yes!  I’ve never regretted saying yes to having sex, even at the times I didn’t ‘feel’ like doing it.  Sometimes you say yes because you know it’s the intimate connection you need with your spouse.”

3. Keep it Playful

As a married couple, your bodies are an amusement park and God has paid for the all-you-can ride pass. Use it!

4. Be Personal

Talk about it. Share what you like and don’t like. What you want to try or not try. Even while in the act of love making, being honest, “I like that or don’t like that.” “Do this or do that.” 

Embrace the awkward. Sex is awkward at times. So many times. It isn’t perfect and flawless like on the movies.


Dave and Ashely Willis – The Naked Marriage Podcast

Dr. Juli Slattery – Authentic Intimacy

Francie Winslow – Heaven In Your Home Podcast 

Tommy Nelson – The Book of Romance